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The latest title–Assassin’s Creed: Valhalla–is no exception to this, being a sprawling tale about the Vikings’ invasion of England. However, most of the messy storytelling actually pops up in the modern-day segments, where the writers unveil several huge twists and attempt to tie this game in with the overarching narrative. Honestly, the convoluted result should be par for the course for longtime fans.
10 Alfred Stays In Exile
After defeating the Order of the Ancients, Eivor encounters Alfred, who has exiled himself in the marshes. The king now lives a humble existence baking bread and washing linens, and he seems oddly satisfied with this. It’s treated as a peaceful end to his character.
In reality, Alfred used this exile to regroup. He soon rallied his allies, took Wessex back from the Vikings, and continued his quest to unify the English kingdoms, becoming perhaps the most essential leader in the war against the Northmen. There’s playing fast and loose with history, and then there’s flat-out ignoring it.
9 You’re Using The Hidden Blade Wrong.
The writers seemed to forget about this requirement as soon as they introduced it in Assassin’s Creed II. Eivor presumably doesn’t have to make this sacrifice since he/she wears the hidden blade on the outside. However, doesn’t this defeat the purpose of the hidden blade? It’s perfectly visible and not even used for assassinations half the time.
Why does Basim even bestow this gift to Eivor? Sure, let’s give the sacred weapon of the Assassins to a hairy Viking with little to no interest in joining the Brotherhood. Sounds like a plan. At least Edward Kenway took it for profit in Black Flag. What’s the excuse here?
8 Desmond Is Alive?
The mysterious Reader never reveals his true identity. However, it doesn’t take much to link his frame and voice to Desmond Miles, the former protagonist of the present segments.
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Even setting aside the idiocy of bringing back the series’ biggest schmuck, this twist strains what little logic is left at this point. Last time players saw him, he touched a glowing orb and sacrificed himself to stop the solar flares from ravaging the planet. How exactly he transported his consciousness into this digital dataspace is anyone’s guess. The Isu, for all their omnipotence, didn’t seem to know he’d survive. Did Juno probe the Abstergo servers for his generic memory? If so, why? You’d call it fan service, but no one liked this guy to begin with.
7 Layla Stays In The Grey
Once Layla discovers the potential for knowledge in this digital realm, she resolves to stay there. Her strategy is to examine the timelines that would have occurred had Desmond not sacrificed himself to stop the apocalypse. This will presumably prevent the other apocalypse in the future.
Ironically, this plan seems to lack any semblance of knowledge or common sense. How would examining what-if scenarios help the current plight in any way? Also, the Reader has been here for years and found nothing, yet Layla supposedly makes a major breakthrough in two minutes? Yeah, right. On the off chance that she does find a clue, she can’t do much with it if she’s stuck in the Grey. Guess it’s time for a third present-day protagonist.
6 No Killing Innocents?
While England has plenty of castles and monasteries ripe for raiding, Eivor and the other Vikings can’t kill non-combatants. Raising an axe against an innocent bystander causes desynchronization.
This doesn’t make much sense when you consider Vikings often didn’t distinguish between their enemies and any unsuspecting people who happened to be in the vicinity. Monks, for instance, would have been a prime target ssince they represented an opposing religion. The raiders were vehemently against this, which is why they specialized in ravaging religious structures. That’s saying nothing of the other unsavory acts that some of them committed for pleasure.
5 The Settlement Shouldn’t Doubt Eivor’s Loyalty
Eivor’s conflict with Sigurd already suffers from the fragmented and unfocused narrative, but this plot point is particularly asinine. After a falling out between the siblings, the settlement questions Eivor’s loyalty. This leads to a boss fight with Dag, one of the Viking clan-mates.
These people have no reason to doubt the protagonist when he/she is seemingly the only one going out and gathering resources for the village. Even if you dismiss that as a gameplay quirk, though, Dag is with Eivor during many of his/her adventures. The ungrateful tool knows everything they do is for Sigurd and the other settlers. It sure is convenient that he forgets that. Otherwise, the game wouldn’t have this contrived conflict.
4 The Aesir Were Isu?
The old games established these beings as godlike entities while not tying them to any specific mythology. Instead of a known deity, players encountered figures like Juno and Minerva, whose origins were ambiguous. Now, though, Valhalla reveals that Odin and the other Norse gods are actually members of the Isu.
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Not only does this reek of laziness, but it opens up a whole new can of worms. Does this mean that gods from other religions were also Isu? Do they have any divine powers? Does this go for all religions or just some of them? Most importantly of all, why would the developers go down this road?
3 What’s The Deal With Yggdrasil?
Norse mythology (and the works it inspired) paint Yggdrasil as a tree that connects the nine realms. This game makes it into Mikoshi from Cyberpunk 2077. It’s a giant Animus that houses the minds of Odin and several other Isu. In addition, it has a bunch of simulations for users to get lost in, such as Valhalla.
Among this device’s other gaps in logic, this begs the question of how it’s not a tourist attraction. Eivor and Sigurd reach it easily enough once they know its location. If it’s in the physical realm of Norway and so readily available for specific use, why did it become associated with myths? The Vikings should have plundered it like any other temple long ago.
2 Why Do Rebecca And Shaun Trust Basim?
Once this Assassin comes into the modern-day storyline, he joins up with Rebecca and Shaun, no questions asked. He then requests to meet their mentor. They immediately go fetch him, leaving Basim alone with the Animus.
These two clowns presumably witnessed the guy clash with Eivor numerous times in the past simulations. Even if they didn’t, though, they’re still willing to trust a man they met five minutes ago? The Assassins have remained hidden for centuries, and the present ones have spent years running from Abstergo. You’d never know that by watching this scene.
1 Eivor Can Change Sexes At Will
Whenever past Assassin’s Creed titles let players choose between a male or female, they created different characters for each one. Odyssey, for example, had Kassandra and Alexios. Like any RPG, you stick with your choice until the end.
Valhalla, on the other hand, lets Eivor switch sexes at any time, chalking it up to a glitch in the Animus. Setting aside the fact that the Viking is now a Trill from Star Trek or a dinosaur from Jurassic Park, everyone in the world treats Eivor exactly the same way regardless of sex. Humans don’t work that way, nor have they ever done throughout history. The folks at Ubisoft have been working on these games and dabbled in different time periods enough that they should know that.
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